Bean there, downed that

How do you like your coffee? Evidently, Americans like it expensive, fancy and often. What else could explain our national obsession with the old cup of Joe? Coffee is to adults, what ice cream is to kids. We can't seem to get enough of it, we like plenty of choices, and we are willing to pay just about any price. It just better be good. Not only are the giants of coffee, like Starbucks, multiplying like backyard rabbits, but also our cravings for java seem to be insatiable.

The drive through at Starbucks makes me wonder what we ever did before we could thrill to the taste of a non fat, mocha latte. So what if it costs almost four bucks (and only fifty cents to make)? There are reports that people will go without essentials (like food), give up extras (like going to movies), and not care about price when it comes to their blessed java. Oh yeah, we are definitely hooked.

There is a "coffee war" raging that pits the Starbucks against the small, neighborhood coffee shop. Now, there is a coffee "delocator" Web site so people can avoid the "sameness of sterile chains" for the "smallness of unique coffee shops." Hate to say it, but does anyone really care? Just get us our coffee!

A woman in California has said that her love affair with coffee is putting a strain on her marriage. Seems that she has to go to the coffee shop every day within ten minutes of waking up and it is "interfering with her home life." When she posted her problem online, she had more than one hundred proposals in a week from men who claimed to share her love of coffee. The message? Dump the husband, enjoy the brew.

Some people get downright frothy if you try to suggest that their love (obsession) with coffee is a problem (addiction). Some medical experts say that coffee drinking is a habit, and caffeine is the big ingredient that keeps us coming back for more. I seriously doubt that. It's the enticing aroma, the artsy ambiance, the beautiful smelling scones and fresh sandwiches, and the cozy feeling that makes a coffee shop so irresistible.
The smooth, dark roast with billowy clouds of frothy milk that tastes like heaven in a sip, is why we have forsaken our home coffeepots. Why drink ordinary when special is just around the corner? One man wrote on a "got to have my java" Web site that after much consideration, he has thrown out his coffeepots for good. He compares making coffee at home as old fashioned as "a grandmother making pie crusts."

It seems some of the fast food places like McDonald's and Dunkin' Donuts are also upgrading their ordinary coffee, so that the common cup is a sheer delight that cannot be duplicated at home. In other words, Dear Readers, pack up your coffeepot because you have no chance of brewing anything worth drinking (excuse me, for being so bold). Let's face it, we've been outdone when it comes to making the morning brew. We might as well give up and admit defeat. We have to drive somewhere to get good coffee.

Okay, so some health conscious person reading this will start percolating and tell me that green tea is much better for us. Someone else will call me and say that buying latte at a coffee shop is the biggest rip off in the world. I'll get an e mail from my doctor saying that caffeine is no good. Maybe my neighbor will be insulted and never ask me if I'd like a cup of (homemade) coffee again. You know what I say? Bean there. Downed that. I'll take my naughty latte any day of the week. Maybe I'll see you in line at one of those pricey local coffee shops.