More than ‘Pomp and Circumstance’

Congratulations! You made it. You have done exactly what your parents and family have wanted you to do–you have graduated from high school or college. Now the “Rest of Your Life” begins, the “Great Adventure” has started, and we are waiting for you to make your mark on the world. Just as your tassels were swinging in the breeze to the processional of “Pomp and Circumstance,” the adults in your life were sighing in relief. Finally, you can start earning your keep.

Hey, kids (oops, I mean graduates), it’s been one expensive ride for your parents. According to some big study that was published in Newsweek, the average American child costs around $200,000 to raise, not to mention college. College costs push the envelope to the upper stratosphere, breaking the pocketbooks of many a parent, not to mention placing a drain on retirement funds. Can you blame parents for crying when they watch you walk on stage to receive your diploma? Those tears are tears of joy. The poverty has ended.

Of course, the children are always worth whatever we spend to give them a better life. But 200,000 bucks? Payback is a stitch. It’s so funny to imagine that I can’t stop laughing. As one Anthem man laments, “Putting two kids through college has wiped out any hope of a decent retirement for me and my wife. Maybe the kids will help us in our older years.” Is this guy kidding? No, he’s absolutely right, in fact, maybe he could start billing them now.

On a brighter note, watching the kids graduate is one of the “moments” in a parent’s life that creates true pride. High school, college–it’s all been quite a journey, and families tend to travel it together. A million memories, help with homework, science experiments, math equations, special reports and endless hours of studying suddenly ends with a cap, gown, diploma and processional. What could be grander? Commencement speeches may drag on a little too long, the line of students may seem endless, but there is something beautiful about hearing your child’s name called up on that stage.

Graduation marks an ending of one huge chapter. It is the single biggest milestone to the next phase. Adulthood is looming in the not‑so‑distant future. Children may move away, get married, have babies, join the military ... leave the nest. Yikes! The patter of little (or big) feet is silenced and no matter how difficult, time‑consuming, expensive and exhausting it was, guiding the kids through those school years might be one of the greatest achievements of all time. As parents, the graduation ceremony and party should be for you.

No, on second thought, it’s the teachers of the world who deserve our applause. Teachers stand up to our kids and they stand up in front of our kids, in an amazing effort to show them the light of learning. Every day teachers climb the mountain and do the impossible–they capture the attention of a teenager for more than 10 minutes. On top of it, they are underpaid and overworked. Teachers deserve more.

Oh, but I digress. Parents, on a practical note, it might be a little premature to start painting your graduate’s bedroom and transforming it into your office. You might want to wait a while (like five years). If you are teary‑eyed because your graduate is leaving home, take heart, the kid will probably be back. If you are crying because your graduate shows no interest in leaving home (ever), remain hopeful. This too, shall pass. The nest will get too small and eventually, the children do leave to make their marks on the world.

To all those graduates–congratulations! Celebrate long, hard and wisely. The world needs you. Now, go out and change it for the better and give your teachers and parents extra hugs. Never forget that “Pomp and Circumstance” is more than a song.